a surprising hospitality

I guess that I really have not been all that surprised by my new life here in Brooklyn. If anything, it has been underwhelming. Underwhelming in the sense that I thought, or perhaps more accurately, most people thought I would think, that moving to the city would be the most overwhelming step I would take in life.

And yet it has not. Very quickly, this place has felt like home and the hustle/bustle of the city has not been intimidating. Instead, I have felt that the constant to and fro of the people in my new neighborhood has been life giving to me. I find myself invigorated by it.

The invigoration of the city seems to stem from the curiosity aroused by my new surroundings. If I sat on the same corner of the same street everyday for a month I am sure that, every day, I would learn significant lessons about my neighborhood and the way people choose to align their lives here. I am fascinated by the confluence of cultures; the irreligious and the devout, those that possess and those that desire, the young and the old, those that have called this place home all their life and those who may be freshly minted U.S. citizens...

There seems to be a sense of shared identity that people have simply by their geographical location that is uncommon in my experience. In that, despite the vast differences that are easy to observe in others, there are many common values and factors in play here as well. I had a conversation this summer where a particular man said to me something along the lines of "People all over think New Yorkers aren't friendly, but I have experienced the exact opposite. People here are the nicest, warmest and most open people I have met." Is this something more than hometown pride? After all, don't most people tout the distinctives of a town they come from? I did, after all, come from a town that is home to a certain insurance giant and a giant in the world of brilliant tasting steak burgers. We brag about that where I come from. Is this the same thing?

Perhaps not. The kindness of the people in my neighborhood is observable. In our world, just being able to see it is something. People open themselves to one another in ways I have not observed in the other contexts I have lived. Of course, there are stereotypical car horns and aged curmudgeons, but in the main people have an air of openness about them that seems to demonstrate what my friend had said.

Except for me. For some reason, people have walked by me a bit more coolly than they walk by my wife. My wife had a 15 minute conversation on the street with someone recently, instigated by that person. That has never happened to me, except in cases where I instigate or when I am with my son (but I am still convinced they are warm to him and not me).

But I have noticed an interesting thing. In the cases where I attempt to instigate some kind of warmth or openness with a passer-by; they respond very favorably, but it jolts them. So far, it is my experience that, in the main, people are surprised by the gesture coming from me. I have to ask a couple questions here. Are people surprised by the gesture of hospitality alone or are people surprised by the fact that the sender of said gesture is a young man? Whatever the reason, the relief and exuberance of the response to my "hello" helps me to confirm the suspicion that the cold passings I normally experience are not due to the people I walk by but perhaps due to the low expectations of what that person might receive in return.

I wonder what that means for what I spend myself doing everyday. Perhaps people really do crave real hospitable spaces where they can be known for who they are and where they can explore paths toward being more than they are so far, but they are afraid of the response they will get if they open themselves by reaching out with the first proverbial head nod or "hello." Perhaps the general lack of welcoming spaces in our world today insulates that longing in people so that it is hard to recognize.

"Come to me, all who are weary and heavy laden. Take up my yoke and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls." What does that mean for the people who follow Jesus?